Monkey Boy's Playground

Tales of the Drunken Monkey

Shiitake Mushrooms

Monkey Boy AJ

 Year?  The future.  Time? Late, late summer.  Day?  Friday.  We start our story in the basement of Drunken Monkey’s home. Sarah is at work on Bob.  At this point Drunken Monkey has come to think that a giant robot may be a handy thing to have around.  Sarah plans to have Bob finished within the week. And for the sake of the city, she had better.

“Man, I hate wearing this ski mask and shirt outfit.  I really have got to make Sarah make me a more official costume.  Ugh…………ugh where are those damn crooks, they escaped into this area-there they are.”

Drunken Monkey spots the criminals that he is on the lookout for.  He jumps off of his perch from the building above and uses one of the robbery suspects to cushion his landing.  He quickly gets to his feet and tackles the other man as he tries to flee.  He uses rope to rodeo tie the perpetrators and leaves them in view for the police as they search for the same two men.

“Well guys it’s been a blast, but it’s time for me to go home and call it a night.” He pauses for a moment.  “Wow I just had a big case of déjà…vu.  Son of a bitch!  Every time things start looking up they have to go and change something!  I’m really starting to get sick and tiered of it!”

On the other side of town the outcome of Drunken Monkey’s déjà vu is coming about.

“Alright Jim, try 150mg that should do the trick.”

Jim and his partner Harry are performing tests on the various primates that they captured from the attack that Oranga-TANG had made on the local zoo.  The men are loyal to Oranga-TANG and his goal of world domination; they are working on making new primate members for the organization and want to have a lieutenant ready for him when he returns.  The subject for today’s test is a chimpanzee.  Harry injects the serum and waits for its affects to take hold.  It only takes a few minutes and the affects of the serum begin to visibly increase the mental capacities of the chimpanzee. 

“Hey there little guy.  Can you understand what I’m saying?”

“No, he’s still not there yet.”

The men give the chimpanzee another smaller dose of 50mg.  This dose has more of an effect on the chimp.  The little chimp starts to show the desired results.  The chimp looks around and takes in his surroundings.

The chimpanzee looks at the men, “I don’t think I should be here.”

The chimpanzee leaps of the table and runs toward the door.  The two men give chase to the primate.  The chimp is much faster than the men and he manages to get to the door before them and escape their clutches.  The men only scream after the chimp, “Ya Chim-Panzy.”

“Oz, we’re screwed.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“I just had the biggest case of déjà vu I have ever had in my life.”

“So?”

“So, there’s something bad about to happen.”

“You’re hallucinating.”

“That was one college party dude, but, no, dude seriously I feel it in my gut.  Something big is coming.”

“Whatever dude I’m going to bed.”

“Alright, I’m going to see how Bob’s coming along.”

Drunken Monkey heads for the basement where Sarah is hard at work on her robot Bob.  Sarah has come a long way.  The robot is nearly 90% finished.  She and the gang have received funding from the city to build the robot.  The mayor feels that the robot may have its uses outside of crime fighting.  All that is left is to install the power generators and finish the exoskeleton and armaments. 

Elsewhere in the night, Chim-Panzy is formulating his plan for the world of Town.  He remembers why Oranga-TANG freed him from the zoo.  He decides that he will once again attempt to set the mark and remind humanity where they originate from.  He begins planning a way to enslave the populous of Town.  The best idea he can come up with is to create a serum that will do the reverse of the serum that created him.  This affect will turn the people of Town into zombies that can then be controlled by Chim-Panzy.  He will insert the serum into the food that is most consumed by the people.  He sets out to discover the target food and to find a lab that he can use to create the serum. 

“Hello again, Chief Daniels, what seems to be the trouble this time?”

“Well, DM, it’s the weirdest break in that I’ve ever seen.  Some one busted into the Target here and stole some toddler clothes.  Just ransacked the racks until they found what they liked I guess.”

“How do you know they stole the clothes?”
            “They left the tags, over on the floor near the pile they didn’t want.”

“Didn’t steal anything else?”

“Nope, and they walked right past the jewelry counter.”

“Yeah that is weird.  Well I hope you find the culprit, I am going home to bed, it’s been another long night.”

“Okay, so now that I have some duds I need some money, but how is a stray chimpanzee going to get money.  I guess I’ll just have to start by robbing someone for their cash on hand.”

Chim-Panzy starts searches the nearby streets and shops of the shopping center to find a candidate.  He spots a lone woman heading for her car in the nearby parking lot of a Wal-Mart.

“I have got to be crazy to rob someone in broad daylight.”

Chim-Panzy sneaks up on the woman as she is unlocking her car door.  He slowly approaches her and then tells her to give him her money.  At the sight of a talking chimpanzee, she freaks dropping her purse.  The woman runs, screaming, back into the store, drawing attention the scene of the crime.  He grabs her purse and runs away to a safer place.

Chim-Panzy gets away with $200.  He decides to try the nearby park in hopes that there will be less of a chance of a visible scene and he can isolate his victims better.  He comes up on a lone man sitting on a bench, he sneaks in and surprises the man demanding that he hand over any money he has.  The man refuses.

“I’m not scared of a talking chimp, and besides what are you going to do if I don’t hand over my money.”

“Um…uh…shit.”

“How about you tell me why you need my money and then we’ll talk.”

Chim-Panzy explains to the man that he wishes to use the money to finance his development of a serum to turn the people of Town into zombies that will follow him.  He also needs money to build a lab to develop the means by which he can develop and deliver the serum. 

“Well my fine friend, allow me to introduce myself.  I am Doctor Kevin Masters, of Left Mind Laboratories.  I would be more than happy to assist you, provided that you help me.”

“What do you want?”

“Cash.”

“Okay, what for?”

“Same as you; research of course.”

Chim-Panzy and Kevin enter partnership.  Chim uses the labs that are owned by Kevin for development of the serum.  Chim has found that the people of Town consume a large deal of mushrooms.  He develops a “mutant” shiitake mushroom.  This new mushroom is very tasty in of its own, but it has been grown to cover and absorb the taste of the serum.  Chim and the doctor work on a plan for distribution of the mushrooms. 

For distribution, Chim-Panzy will sell some of the mushrooms fresh at the town’s framer’s market.  The rest he will reseal in store bought packages.  Any one that consumes the mushrooms will become zombies and want nothing else than to seek him out.  The effects of the serum will be triggered by a tone that Chim sound from nearby.  Those that are infected will follow Chim’s orders.  The people of Town will be the tools of there own downfall.  It is only a short matter of time until the zombie apocalypse is upon the people of Town.

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